An Economic Conundrum, Part I

Since (obviously) I'm a little late to put in my NFL picks for this week, I'll have to bore you with a completely different subject. Economics.

I know, you roll your eyes or click off the page, but try to bear with me here. After reading Stephen Levitt's Freakonomics last week I finally realized that not every topic pertaining to my college major (that's right, I was an Econ major) has to function as a mild sedative.

Imagine for a moment a major automobile firm hires a new CEO. The CEO is tasked with making the company profitable once again, and doing it quickly. So the CEO does what CEOs are paid to do-- he lays off thousands of employees and shifts his manufacturing plant to South America, where labor is cheaper. Cheaper labor equals higher revenue which, when all other factors are held constant, produces higher profits. On a limb, I'm going to guess that you won't have a difficult time believing this hypothetical scenario.

So is this CEO a good businessman or is he a ruthless jerk? He's made the company profitable with essentially the only quick-fix option available (you could argue for marketing or improved product line, but those are long-term solutions in a highly competitive market where small gains in market share come at a substantial price-- if you don't believe that, just look at Hyundai, who has taken decades to recover from a poor image... and most people still think they suck).

Realistically, he is both. He has at once made himself and his company richer while potentially ruining the lives of thousands of semi-skilled workers. Hard working Americans who hadn't deserved maltreatment by some white-collar shmuck (and whose options for retalitation are essentially zero).

So this is our basis of economic reality. There are, more often than not, two truths to every situation, and those truths will vary drastically depending on your viewpoint. One could hardly fault a board of directors for providing that CEO with a nice bonus package, at the same time as one could hardly blame a now-unemployed Joe Smith for urinating in that CEO's gas tank.

We'll take this as our starting off point and build from here. I'd hate to post more than a few hundred words per article since I know that, generally speaking, the blogging community at large rarely has much free time...

And don't worry, I am going somewhere with this. Seriously.

A Day at the Ballpark, Part II

I realized yesterday that there was a ton of material I left out of the last post. This may have been due to the sheer volume of data posted, or it might have been the fact that I was temporarily stoned... I'll let you decide... but either way:

* I wanted to take a minute to recognize the Yankees' dubious feat of signing the baseball player who most resembles an animitronic robot from Chuck E Cheese. I'm talking, of course, about journeyman Sal Fasano. A cult hit in Philly during his brief tenure there, Fasano is now the backup to Jorge Posada. Unfortunately, the fu manchu you see below didn't last in New York (facial hair regulations-- more on that later).

Anyway, here's the photo comparison of Sal and Pasqually, otherwise known as "the Italian guy" or "the chef" or "the fat guinea" from Chuck E Cheese's band (I threw the term 'guinea' in there because, let's face it, Pasqually is at best a poorly conceived stereotype).

(Author's aside: Isn't it about time the Yankees rethought their facial hair rules? I'm not talking about allowing mohawks or anything crazy like that, but shouldn't the fu manchu be legal? Giambi started to grow one a few weeks ago and almost looked like a tough guy again. It made New Yorkers collectively realize, "Oh right, we did sign a shaggy slugger from Oakland five years ago," immediately followed by anger over the metrosexual, juiced-up Right Guard spokesperson they actually got. Personally, I think Giambi would have been much better off in the big apple with a huge 'stache and long hair. Maybe that's just me)

* More on the "wrong jersey" phenomenon. I had forgotten about the Mets game, where a kid in the next row was wearing a Terrell Owens jersey (with the Eagles, no less). Next to him was another individual wearing a New Jersey Nets jersey. This was only slightly less defensible than the fan in the deck below us wearing a Jeremy Shockey jersey (I suppose the thought being that at least it was the right city-- although keep in mind that NFL jerseys don't display the city name).

But the TO jersey? Shockey... well... no. No, I still can't see it. Wouldn't do it. Wearing a Yankees cap to a Giants game is one thing (quite common, actually), since at least both logos are "NY." But the TO jersey? I'm at a loss. What exactly are you saying? At least if you wore, let's say, a Tigers cap to a Mets-Dodgers game, you're at least in the right sport. Then you're saying, "You know, regardless of the outcome I'm just a baseball fan at heart." But the TO jersey? That's sending a message of, "Yes, well, I am not routing exactly for any particular team, but I want it to be known that, generally speaking, I am a fan of sports... in general."

Was it an East-coast West-coast thing? Are we still on that? (Please forgive me if I haven't listened to a rap album that's been released in the last 10 or so years, I'm still catching up to Dr. Dre's "The Chronic" at this point). Somebody help me out here.

* Of course, the absolute worst offender of the two games I attended last weekend was the gentelman in the photo to the right.

Notice two things here, if you haven't already. First, notice the fan seated at the bottom right of the image. Now, if you can make it out, look at the logo painted on the field at the top left of the image (if you're missing your binoculars, it's a Yankees logo). That's right, he wore a Red Sox Johnny Damon jersey to a Yankees - Red Sox game.

Now I'm really at a loss. To me, this is worse than the TO jersey at the Mets game, because at least that can be chalked up to general confusion. This is far more deliberate. I mean, who are you supporting? The Yanks' leadoff hitter? Or the Red Sox? Or are you still hung up on 2004? Can fans of either team support that? Shouldn't you be thrown out of the park for that? Or at least be forced to turn it inside out?

(Now, if you're curious, this young fellow was supporting the Sox, as evidenced by his hat, which was a Red Sox '04 World Series cap. Looks like we solved that one after all.)

* Finally, I'll leave you with a quote taken from the fans in the seats behind me, during a pinch-hit by Bernie Williams (a lifelong Yankee, since 1991).
Fan 1: "Who's that? Who's Williams?"
Fan 2: "Yeah. Bernie Williams."
Fan 1: "Didn't he used to play for the Sox?"
Me: (spraying beer through my nose in disbelief)

Now, was that taken out of context? Sure. Is it representative of the broader Red Sox fan base in general? No. But does it support my personal opinion that Sox fans are dumber than rocks? You bet.

And isn't that what having a blog is all about?

A Day at the Ballpark

I found myself in the Bronx today, slightly north of Manhattan, although I'll give you that it was planned.

Yes, today was a day to spend indulging in our country's favorite pastime. Er, well, baseball. Coincidentally enough, this happened last Saturday as well. See, being in Albany, NY makes me just a quick trip down Interstate 87 to the city (about 150 miles, if you're counting). There, I can experience all the riches it has to offer, as well as many of the poors.

To make a long story short, I caught a Mets-Dodgers game at Shea Stadium last Saturday, and the first game of a Yankees-Red Sox doubleheader at Yankee Stadium a week later. The following unassorted ramblings are what emerged from those experiences.

(Author's aside: And let me just clear up something for the audience at this point, since apparently liking both the Mets and Yankees is the sports equivalent of gay incest [and let's see the google search hits I get out of that phrase], as other New York sports fans will tell you. I grew up and am currently a Yanks fan. Period. My brother-in-law is a huge Dodgers fan, hence the Mets trip. Although, when I think about it, I don't root against the Mets [except in the 2000 World Series]... and you could say I generally enjoy when they're doing well... but then I rarely follow the National League, so I really don't care what people think at this point... I think I'm done with this argument)

* First off, most of this is going to focus on the Yankees leg of this trip, since I'm not as big of a Mets fan (see above) and Shea is kind of a dump.

And when I say 'kind of a dump,' I mean the area behind the outfield fence looks like a construction site (although I should point out here that the area beyond that is a construction site). The nicer stadiums will have fountains or grass back there (KC and Anaheim come to mind), or in many cases have bleachers for seating (Wrigley, Arlington), but Shea has a bunch of pavement, assorted scaffolding, and a shoddy-looking homerun apple (that comes out of a top hat each time a home run is hit, making it one of the more obnoxious tangible metaphors in all of sports). Seating is nice, concession area fine, but to have all that out there in plain view of most of the crowd is bush league.

* Do you think Johnny Damon would be less controversial if he were called John? John Damon just doesn't have the same ring to it (and, as a public service, I will explain here that his given name is Johnny-- it's not a nickname). I don't know why I think that is pertinent in any way (or interesting or amusing, for that matter), I just felt the need to share.

* Somebody a few rows ahead of me loudly called David Ortiz "Donkey Kong" during his first at-bat. It got a mild laugh from the crowd initially (I mean, Ortiz chucking barrels is a pretty amusing thought), until everybody slowly realized that it was probably a racial epithet... at which point things became quiet for a few moments. Pretty awkward.
Pretty awkward.

* To truly appreciate Yankees and Red Sox fans, you really need to be present during one of their head-to-head matchups. It's really at a point where the fans scream louder and louder not to cheer on their own team, but to rampantly annoy the fans from the other team. It's gone beyond the players. It's personal.

(And, if I may point out, none of the cheering was creative in any sense. Not that this should be surprising. Mostly, save for the aforementioned ethnic slur, it consisted of "Yankees suck" or "Red Sox suck," the only real difference being the accent in which it was yelled)

* I have a problem, not limited to baseball events but really any sporting event, of people not wearing the right jerseys to the game. I'm not talking about wearing an away jersey to a home game or anything like that, but.. well, let's give my example here. In Yankee stadium yesterday, a gentleman was wearing a Julius Peppers jersey. Which would have been fine with me... except for the fact that Mr Peppers is employed by the Carolina Panthers of the NFL. So at a NY-Boston baseball game, you're reprezentin' Raleigh. In football.
Keepin it real.

* Speaking of apparel, I've also noticed a growing trend of fitted baseball caps with the stickers still on them (particularly the size sticker on the top of the brim). Seems to be a hip-hop thing, but a palebottom like me wouldn't know much about that (I don't get out much). See, I sit there and try to figure out the logic in that. I obsess about these things I don't understand. Do they compare sizes? Is that it? Is it a dominance thing?

If I see another young male on the street and he's sporting a size 7, but I'm rocking my 7 3/8, do I now get to be cooler? And conversely, if I'm in the presence of a 7 5/8, do I curtsey or something? These are things I need to understand.

* And lastly, and perhaps most importantly, on my way back up I passed a Red Carpet Inn.

Let that sit for a second.

Now do you see where I'm going with this? The sheer potential of sexual puns for guys dating redheaded girls? Why has nobody brought this to my attention sooner? Is it so obvious to the public consciousness that we all just simply missed it in front of our noses? Or am I the only one juvenille enough to make a pubic hair joke about an economy hotel?

I'll let you think about that one. Until next time...

Back to the Gridiron

Back from hibernation, at least temporarily. But without further ado, here's Week 2's NFL picks.

Buffalo at Miami (-7)
Apparently, this spread is an indication that football scouts around the corner haven't given up on Daunte Culpepper yet. That's pretty funny, because for a player to get run out of Minnesota of all places, no less than a year after a near-MVP season, it's telling. We'll just leave it at that.
On the other hand, who's throwing for Buffalo these days? Losman still? Jesus Christ.
Game: Miami
Spread: Buffalo

Carolina at Minnesota (+1)
Toughest game to call this week. On the one hand, you have Carolina, a good team last year expected to do big things this year... and they get beat last week by a (supposedly) lousy team. Of course, this same thing happened last year too, and they made the playoffs (after that inspiring week 1 loss to New Orleans).
Minnesota... well... last year they went on a late run with Brad Johnson at QB, but that was against mostly crappy teams and their defense helped out too (not to mention Lady Luck). But then they go out and surprise Washington (another trendy playoff pick this year), in Washington, in front of a Monday Night audience.
I'm overthinking this, aren't I?
Game: Carolina
Spread: Carolina

(Author's aside: Anybody else catch the new trio in the Monday Night booth? Are there any other conclusions other than Tony Kornheiser should be doing color without Joe Theisman? Any doubt that Kornheiser couldn't carry that? Does Theisman add anything to that booth other than another few gallons of carbon dioxide?)

Cleveland at Cincinnatti (-10)
Let's see, so Carson Palmer is back at full strength, and the Browns let a Saints rookie pile up 120 yards of offense in week 1. What exactly is the question again?
Game: Cincy
Spread: Cincy

Detroit at Chicago (-7)
Detroit's defense only let up 3 measly field goals to the Superbowl runner-up in week 1. That's surprising (more on that later). Chicago's D shut out an (incredibly aged) Brett Farvruh. The edge goes to Chicago, obviously, but you have to wonder.
Well, not for very long... but still.
Game: Chicago
Spread: Chicago

Houston at Indy (-13.5)
I'd just like to take this time to congratulate Houston's front office. Now, I know this subject has been beaten to death since April, but come on. I'll give you that they also had incredibly bad luck. But come on. You pass on the next Marshall Faulk (let's not go overboard yet on Bush) to draft a defensive lineman. Really? And then, to make matters worse, your "star" tailback gets injured... but instead of giving up some actual talent for an NFL running back, you go out and get Ron Dayne and Samkon Gado. Wow. Now that is building for the future.
Game: Indy
Spread: Indy

New Orleans at Green Bay (+2.5)
Nice win for New Orleans last week against Cleveland. Green Bay, well, wow. Just wow. Can't quite find the words for that one.
And yet, Brett Farvrvruh's last season, home game, playing a bad road team... they can't lose, right? That can't happen. It's not supposed to happen.
Game: Green Bay
Spread: Green Bay

New York Giants at Philly (-3)
I was a little surprised at this spread (essentially means the teams are dead even except for home field advantage), given that the Giants hung tough against Indy. They've improved their defense while Philly has remained somewhat stagnant on offense.
Game: Giants
Spread: Giants

Oakland at Baltimore (-12)
Spread seemed high here too. I wouldn't go getting all hard for Baltimore yet, McNair's bound to break down (over/under is week 6), and their defense can't be that much better (over/under on Ray Lewis' injury is week 9). But then, their defense pitched a shut out last week. Meanwhile, Oakland's impotent attack was shut out. Almost looks like the makings of a huge upset. Almost.
Game: Baltimore
Spread: Baltimore

Tampa Bay at Atlanta (-5.5)
Woooo! Go Chris Simms! Wooooo!
Game: Atlanta
Spread: Atlanta

Arizona at Seattle (-7)
Are we done yet? How many teams are playing this week? Did we expand again? Geez.
OK, right. Arizona is another trendy playoff pick this year, but I wouldn't bet on the defending NFC champions at home. Just, call it a hunch.
Always call Kurt Warner a hunch.
I don't even know what that means.
Either way, Seattle should be taken to task for only putting up 3 field goals against Detroit's defense. We're talking about Detroit here. They've got one of the worst General Managers of all time! For God's sake, he could actually get advice from Dan Duquette and Isiah Thomas. The guy makes Vince Young look like Ken Jennings!
And you just went to the Super Bowl!!
Ugh.
Game: Seattle
Spread: Seattle

St Louis at San Francisco (+3)
Would be an impressive feat if the Rams really beat up on San Francisco here. They might have an impressive team this year, what with Marc Bulger healthy again and Steven Jackson not going anywhere (not to mention Torry Holt).
Then, Antonio Bryant looked good at wideout for the Niners last week, and Vernon Davis was also a pleasant surprise (although I'm still pissed at him for getting drafted one pick before me in my fantasy league this year... I'm sure it's his fault somehow). I just don't think Alex Smith is ready yet-- although he has his moments.
Whatever.
Game: St Louis
Spread: St Louis

KC at Denver (-11)
Pretty sucky loss for Denver last week. I doubt they'll have trouble bouncing back at home against a depleted KC offense (and let's just wait and see what effect Trent Green's head injury will do to Larry Johnson's "Second Coming of Christ" fantasy season).
Game: Denver
Spread: Denver

New England at New York Jets (+6)
You know what, screw it, I'm going for it. I'm taking the Jets as the upset game this week.
Game: NYJ
Spread: NYJ

Tennessee at San Diego (-12)
Yep... so we got Kerry Collins against a defense coming off a week in which it shut out an offense that includes Randy Moss. Yep... that's what we got.
Game: San Diego
Spread: San Diego


Washington at Dallas (-6)
I swore I wasn't going to fall into the "Redskins are good" trap this year. But then 20 bucks later after a loss to the Vikings, I knew I had done it again. WHY??? WHY DO I ALWAYS DO THIS?!?!??
Game: Dallas
Spread: Dallas

Pittsburgh at Jacksonville (+2)
Yeah, so apparently Pittsburgh could've won with any quarterback last year. I mean, if Charlie Batch can lead them to victory... you can literally stick any quarterback there. Anybody call Ryan Leaf for this?
Game: Pittsburgh
Spread: Pittsburgh

NERD CORNER
Decided to start a new feature this year, dealing with Fantasy sports. The rumor mill is telling me that it's becoming quite popular with the children.
OK, fine, you got me. I've been obsessed for years. Happy now?
Up the slope:
Heath Miller (TE PIT). Expect bigger things with Randle-El out of the picture. They lose some creativity (losing the Harlem Globetrotter of the NFL will do that) but they'll make up for it with their TE.

Down the slope:
Frank Gore (RB SF). Don't expect 160 total yards and 2 scores every week (duh). His week 1 stats were more likely a factor more of the fact that the defense had Cardinals jerseys on. Don't drop him, just don't get the tattoo yet.

Over the hill:
Darrell Jackson (WR SEA). I know, another 'duh' with the signing of Branch. But people really need to know to drop him, now that he has 3 other NFL starters to compete with for catches... on a team that features Shawn Alexander at tailback (which was an odd signing, especially for a team that needed another receiver like Baywatch needed another boob job).

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