The World's Worst Covers

After cleaning up the vomit on my keyboard, I knew I had to post about this: the single worst cover I have heard in a long, long, long time.
For some strange reason (actually, it's not such a strange reason-- it's stupid, but it's not strange) two worthless bands, The Used and My Chemical Romance, released a cover of the classic Queen/David Bowie collaboration, "Under Pressure."
Let that sink in for a moment. Bowie and Freddie Mercury, two of rock's top 10 legends, being covered by somebody who's best known for dating Kelly on a season of "The Osbournes."
Ouch.
There are three distinct rules for covering any song:

1. If you cover in the same genre as your usual music, don't go more than a few levels over your head. For example, the aforementioned no-talent bums could have covered Beck's "Loser," or something more along those lines (If you're covering across genres, go nuts)
2. You can't cover anything that was written in the last 15 years.
3. Make it your own. Don't just play the same song note for note. A cover needs to reflect both the original and the current artist.

The 'Under Pressure' cover violates rules 1 and 3, thus making it completely unlistenable. It also violates another musician rule, which is: If you have a song that you only play in concert (as this song was for these two "bands"), keep it that way. When you release it as a single, you're not doing it for your fans, you're doing it for your record company. It's the fast lane to selling out.

That being said, let's run down some of the best and worst covers (in this ex-DJ's humble opinion), in no particular order. Note that this list doesn't include songs that were merely sampled (not actually covered), thus eliminating most every hip-hop song known to man (especially Will Smith).

Worst:

• "Under Pressure" by Bowie/Queen, performed by The Used/My Chemical Romance
• "Wish You Were Here" by Pink Floyd, performed by Fred Durst (gag-inducing, if you weren't already crying for David Gilmour and Roger Waters)
• "Live and Let Die" by Bob Dylan, performed by Guns 'n' Roses (not a bad song, but when you hear the original, you realize how painful the remake is)
• "My Perogative" by Bobby Brown, performed by Britney Spears (I'm sobbing as I write that)
• "Simple Man" by Lynyrd Skynyrd, performed by Shinedown (probably the worst tribute imagineable to one of the best southern rock bands to walk the earth)
  

Best:

• "I Will Survive" by Gloria Gaynor, performed by Cake (anytime you can make a roller-disco anthem into a damn fine rock song, you're doing pretty good)
• "Mrs. Robinson" by Simon & Garfunkle, performed by The Lemonheads
• "Dazed & Confused" by Led Zeppelin, performed by Electrasy (nobody's ever heard of this brit-pop band, and because of that they almost violate Rule #1, but it's just a cool song)
• "Smooth Criminal" by Michael Jackson, performed by Alien Ant Farm
• "Turn the Page" by Bob Seger, performed by Metallica (if I didn't mention this I'd be shot)

Am I missing a ton? Of course I am. I'd never argue that. Especially because this list was right off the top of my head (there's a punk cover of Sinead O'Connor's "Nothing Compares" I like also, although I have no freakin' clue who does it).

Leave your thoughts as a comment on this post if you'd like to contribute. In fact, please do.

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