Didn't this Happen in Fight Club?
I feel like the Frosted Mini-Wheats commercial.
Two sides of me are constantly battling -- no, not frosted vs non-frosted-- it's the hippie vs the yuppie. I'll illustrate some examples: I'm pro-environment but I think the arguments for global warming are mostly bullshit; I wear sandals to work but I work on computers all day; I'm stoned often but... um... ok I guess the hippie won that round. But you get the picture.
The two sides are constantly at odds. Take yesterday, for example. I decided to take the notacar (read: bike) out for a ride. I was sporting Birkenstocks, a plain white t-shirt and cut off courdoroy shorts, but the bike has a computer that clocks the speed and mileage of the trip. Again, the conflict. I had gone about 5 miles when I hit the State University campus here in Albany (whose mascot is the great danes, by the way. Purple and yellow great danes, no less. Enough said). I was cutting through parking lots and avoiding the occasional student when I decided to hop a curb.
In hindsight, it was a bad idea.
Thirty feet after the curb I noticed my back tire had gone completely flat. I tried pumping it back up (the yuppie packed an air pump), but to no avail. The hose was shot. Ride over.
So there I was, a dirty sweaty hippie on the side of a campus service road. Mother Earth certainly wasn't lending any support. Luckily, yuppie-boy remembered to pack a cell-phone (never leave home without it), so I ended up calling my buddy for a ride. The conversation went like this:
Me: Hey, what are you doing?
Him: Getting baked and watching 'Team America*', wanna stop by?
Me: Yeah but I need a ride.
Him (incredulously): From your house? (I live a half mile away)
Me: From SUNY** (I explain the flat tire)
Him: Fuck, dude. You're fucked (laughs).
(Pause)
Him: Just kidding. I'll get you.
So the hippie went home, got fried and watched movies, oddly in the mood for Frosted Mini Wheats. The yuppie went to the store at lunchtime today and picked up a 5 dollar bike tube... and paid with his credit card.
The battle rages on.
* One of the funniest movies I've ever seen. This deserves its own post. Soon.
** Acronym for State University of New York. Pronounced SOO-nee.
*** Come back Monday for the blog exchange. See next post for details.
posted by BJC @ 4:23 PM
Your thoughts (2 so far)
2 Comments:
Nothing wrong with being in the middle of the road as far as being a huppie...Protecting our world from pollution etc while enjoying the best that it has to offer...as far as pot is concerned at least it's not filled with the poison's that cigarette's have......thanks for the link to my blog
Alison,
Lay off the weed. You're funny.
But about the programming/driving bit, I can guarantee you that nothing of consequence will ever happen when I'm stoned; this includes working and pretty much any form of transportation that does not include walking to Domino's.
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