Turkey

I always let myself get fooled into thinking that turkey (the poultry, not the country), which contains protein, will help me stay awake. However turkey also contains tryptophan, which makes you sleep. Guess which ingredient wins?
Protein is supposed to give you energy and build muscle tissue, but it takes a distant second to the tryptophan in turkey. Maybe the protein in turkey works by having a midget follow you around with a pick-axe and an air pump waiting for you to fall asleep after you order a turkey sandwich.
Hey, it could happen.

Author's note: I'm reading this post a day after the fact, and I feel it necessary to clarify that I was not, in fact, high when I wrote this. I swear.

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